BuTteRfLY_PrInCeSs

BUTTERFLY BY MARIAH CAREY

When you love someone so deeply
They become your life
It’s easy to succumb to overwhelming fears inside
Blindly I imaged I could
Keep you under glass
Now I understand to hold you
I must open my hands
And watch you rise

Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were ment to be
So spread your wings and fly
Butterfly

I have learned that beauty
Has to flourish in the light
Wild horses run unbridled
Or their spirit dies
You have given me the courage
To be all that I can
And truly feel your heart will
Lead you back to me when you’re
Ready to land

I can’t pretend these tears
Aren’t over flowing steadily
I can’t prevent this hurt from
Almost overtaking me
But will stand and say goodbye
For you’ll never be mine
Until you know the way it feels to fly

The ER Concert was alright….i liked last year’s one better…i wished the attendance was like before…im kinda dissapointed~ But hey…like what MErvin said, it sure did change some people’s life…and i believe so too…hopefully all u out there have found ur Truth…even if the truth isnt found….it will be out there…and it requires time and prompt patience..

So, about the finale…I DIDNT FALL!!!! Yeah!!! Here’s the pic of our finale…

Actually this pic is a re-do after the whole concert…*chuckles*

The Agnus Dei’s dance was my favorite cos its so vulnerable and versatile …sigh…like me…

Overall, it was good …This is me and my dancers

Gonna miz ya’ll…till we meet to perform again ~

And OOHOHHOHOHO!!! Today, Fab and i went shopping…i bought another Fur cropped cardigan from French Gallery….*its the least i can do to make myslef happy*…and then we went to watch the Band Fest at the Ampitheater….and while we were walking down the path…HitZ.Fm cruisers caught us and asked us to do the UVJ thingy…so we were like ON CAMERA!!! OMG…and DJ IAN was there tooo~ *oh, faints* Man, he’s cute! So, watch out for the show UVJ on channel 16, HitZ.TV alright? Catch us in action at the Band Fest…and we requested the song from LL Cool J and J.Lo. —> Control Myself…

AND, We couldnt MIZZ takin a pic with the ever-so-cute DJ IAN…

*____*

What a day~

HitZ.FM cruisers

At the Band Fest Field..

What a day and what a way to keep myself occupied! and, slowly, i’ll forget about the jerk!

LoVe…

MeLiSsA

Feelin kinda sad when i got to know that Justin’s having a new girlfriend and stuff like that…OUCH…yeah, it hurts, i’ve been sober for the past few days, drinking my heart out then i realised - "What the Fu*K are u doin to urself gal??? Get back up on ur feet and kick his stinking ASS!" ANd to break up without an explaination - a proper one, is a NO NO for me!! I aint gonna let him go juz like tat! So, a call to comfirm and yeah, i got my answer…again it was another OUCH! but hey..im a strong gal~ U know what…continue ur player attitide, u aint goin no where…and whoever that gal is, i’m gonna be better than her…cos gals like that has no dignity and steals other people’s bf…Karma baby, Karma will turn around to get u, its only a matter of time

In the mean time, HAVE FUN…yeah , HAVE LoTsa Fun~ like i care! HmmppH! Aarrggh! Man..i hate this phase of life~

Despite all the sadness im going thru, im glad there’s also someone always by my side to comfort me and support me…and time will tell…i mean…i mean…i donno…errr.. (Full stop already!)

Porbably, with time, i’ll find my prince out there….but i know SOMEONE, turned from a FROG into a PRINCE deeee…hahahha! Only U know what im talking about~ Ahem~

For the whole week, Kelvin was here from KL so, d gals and i brought him around …on Wednesday, we went to watch Over the Hedge…erm..well, it wasnt as good as i tot it would be, i was Expecting nortorous laughteR but, erm…all i can manage is smile..

Right after that, we went to Tao for a drink and im really impressed with the interior decos…it was just such a glamourous and enlightening environment to be in…i even noticed that there were dried chillis hanging by the doors..and the tiny waterfall made everything oh, so splendid…so calming…felt really good that time…juz cant express the feeling…esp what i’ve been thru for the past 2 weeks…

LAst night, we went sort of like-club hopping…everywhere was so full…went over to Terminal one…for its opening ceremony…its kinda cool, but packed so, we had to leave…Rainforest was extra packed too…and we ended up in Mc3… –> My most DREADED place…but yesterday, i was like…too engrossed with the thoughts in my mind that i din even mind where i was and just drank my heart out…but i was in control okay…tears juz came rolling outta my eyes onto my cheek…and then, i thought i looked pathetic , crying over a bygone! Stupid me! Aaarrggh! A chick came up to me and asked me if im okay… i was erm..shocked…she was in the washroom before and i guess she followed me to where i was standing…erm…weird but, sweet of her~

Last night, SOMEONE took me to the stars too…and pointed out the stars to me so, i could reach them in the dark night sky~ and i was touched… solely touched~ wow…

So…mom wont let me go to KL…but i wont stop pestering her.. hehehe..but maybe i shud juz be a good gal and listen to her right? Well…i can go end of the year anyways, so , yeah, LET KL GO!!!

Tonight’s the concert, im kinda nervous bout it, afraid i’ll fall during the balancing act…but all my hope’s on the two boys carrying me!!!  Yikes…scary..Brandon is like an anti-gravity boy…he looses his grip man! Cant help to think of what i’ll do if i fall…but i gotta have confidence in them!

LovE,

MeLiSsA

Okay, i have to admitt~ U guys at Swinburne sure know how to throw a party…tho im not from Swinburne, but as an outsider, i had a good time…yeah, esp at a time like this…and u guys are super friendly and cool!~ CheerS to the Swinburne ppl~

Overall, the dances were great and ppl are really opened there, i liked the Salsa couple the most…and boy, were they gooD~ And the gals were shakin’ their booty and did some hot and sexy moves which actually shook up the whole hall and made the guys go wild! My favorite was the Lose my Breath and Me against the Music…those were the competitors…i mean the opponents and they were great too…didnt like it tho when one of the girl dancers shot me an erotic look with her tongue and stuff… —> Made my hair stand on ends! Ohhh…not forgettin the Melbourne Shufflers…oh…that was the bomb!

Here, i wanted to take the pic of the Dance floor but  Eric Lee walked passed…and i think this shot was cool~ Aint he cute??

I took lots of videos tho…but erm…donno how to insert into this blog ..

Besides that, i got myself a new hair cut…at Exxa …cool place to have a hair cut, but too bad, its closing down…poor thing…

Here’s me with my new look~ don mind the eyes…its been puffy for a few days~

AhA! and i can do this too…

Whadda ya think?

Thanks Alvin …my bro who’s always cared for me and taken care of me all this while..tho ur so far away , u still get the news huh? And..im glad u help to make my day…

Qoute from Alvin’s xanga blog..

"Someday you’ll find the place, is a place where love takes over hate, and you’ll see all the things you do, affect everyone around you. Then you’ll see, there’s no fear at all, if you held my hand and we can take down the wall, as I look at you with nothing to say, You should understand why I push You away, You’ll look for and now You’ll see, that the only one You needed was Yourself!"

Im feeling much much better now, tho i developed gastric pain for the past week…but hey, im fine…don worry bout me…

Friends have been really caring, hanging out with me nearly every night…and then i have my concert coming up, and i can dance my heart out…now having really bad sorethroat coz i sang my heart out in Iguana, and thanks to my beZ friends who allow me to let me tears roll and embarrased myself in the lounge by crying while they sang all those emotional songs…then, after that, i felt much better~

I’ll be treating myself to a ME ONLY vacation over the Gawai from the 1st-4th of June…going away to KL to find some peace and then shop till i drop…erm…i’ve never been so lonely…im like walking up and down of my house’s stair case aimlessly…sigh…im gonna be doing this for a long long time..so i gotta get used to this…well, at least i wont be going out for so many dinners, so it can help me keep fit…no more late night suppers…and stuff like that..

Im meeting new faces at the right time….maybe its the right thing to do for now~ Met my very long long long time friend Eric in Bing! Never knew i would ever see him again…we lost contact for about 4-5 years already and were trying to reach other and he thought i was at Curtin Miri….

Eric, im really glad to see u once more…and pls la…Eat up, u look soooo thin now…

I can smile and am starting to eat a little today~

FennLyn says :

girls are simple

u just need to let them feel and know tat u truly care for them,
n love them
nothing much
but y doest it seems so hard?
sometimes we just need ur concern
a conversation, a call or even a sms would made us feel so much better

y failed to do so?

Thanks my friends out there, for helping me get over this break up thing…im really still clinging on to old memories….but will try my best not to think about it too much…i had to see Justin today, to clear things up and BoY! Did he look good! Sigh! and smelled good too~ Jeeze…its gonna be a long long time…to do lots of forgettin’ homework…

And , Kim, i’ll take ur advice, i’ll smile at everyonE ! I mean it, even if they catch me with a huge net and throw me into assilum…in a mental institution…i’ll need the break..

Sam , thanks for ur support too…he came to my house during his lunch break and i was about to bath, and he said this to me….that actually made me smile the whole day "Melissa, for the 1st time, u Look at ur most UGLIEST!"…i had a towel wrapped around me and another one on my shoulder..my hair was in a mess, my face all flushed and my eyes as big as a goldfish’s..make up all smeared…i really think i looked cute~ hahah j/k…he told me to take a pic and post it in my blog _shucks! Shud have!

Tonight, im glad i have all my friends coming over to cheer me up and then head for dinner and then watch Poseidon… —-> HEY, doesnt Poseidon have some LOVE scenes in it? Where the guy near drowning says "I need u to say u love me!" OH! Im so gonna load my bag with lots of Tissues tonight!!!!

Why does breaking up need to be so tough?????? I hate going thru this process…it makes me feel like a weed among the rose bush and there’s thorns everywhere, poking and pricking and stabbing me…

Now, that’s me at one of my ugliest points…a few hours later…at least better than when Sam saw me…

I know, i know! I can read ur mindS!..Eeewww.. Makes me laugh to see it too…at least..

Im using this color again….coz im still feeling very blue….very depressed…sad and so dissapointed in guys….to me, its like i cant pour any hope on guys…sorry to say…ur all the same~ I miss him dearly…really…but cheating behind my bacK? That! i cannot accept~ u cant hide…no wonder i can feel the signs and symptoms of a heartbreak coming along and it did~

2 nights, while working, i kept thinking of u..and juz last night, i was willing to sacrifice my sleeping day, to go and look for you and try to make things up…and save the relationship….but i had doubts…so i called up a really reliable source.. A GUY! He said, ur definitely two-timing and obviously don wanna have anything to do with me..well, u know what, im not gonna let that pull me down, IM STRONGER! And when Melissa gets STRONG, that’s the creepy part…its a LIVING HELL!

people who know me well knows i don let things pass me by JUST LIKE THAT! Some ppl don need to know me well to do so~ I cried alright, tons of tears came out…lost my sodium and some electrolytes , made my eyes puffy…cant concentrate on work…cried summo and cried more~ Well, its only temporary..i’ll regain my strength and it my potion to my soul power..One day, u’ll regret…all ur bullshits, i return back to you…ur sweet words, all turned sour…As i friend i can accept you again…i don like making enemies…but hold ur ground, don come close…coz u hurt me and u hurt me real bad~ Cant deny i had intense feelings for u…thats why im saying all these, out of anger…im sorry it had to turn this way…Its My bad!

According to my Feng Shui book, it clearly stated that i’ll either have a devastating end to my relationship or i’ll have a perfect ending…turns out i got the 1st one…so, this makes me know ur true colours~ But, i wanna say, ur a good guy…thanks, for the cherished memories…but temptations come and go…guess u got caught in Temptation’s Web…Good luck to you!